Monday, April 27, 2015

Happy Hoarder Day # 58 Everything Place April 26, 2015

Happy Hoarder  Day # 58 Everything Place April 26, 2015
 A journey into cleaning up a big pile of..... hoard
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                                                        Everything Place

                                                                       by Janet S. Tiger  
                                                            (c) 2015     all rights reserved
                                                               tigerteam1@gmail.com

A place for everything.  Everything in its place.  The goal.  The goal line?  I awake itching, and start on my patented anti-itch solution system - first, I put on the anti-itching creams, ointments and other solutions that are guaranteed to relieve the horror.  Dependable as always, they do not work, so I begin organizing and de-cluttering....and trying to find the proverbial Everything Place where the items I want to keep will have a home.

Searching for a home - a year ago I had just found a new one, and was ready to begin the first year of moving, which is like one giant itch.

Grateful for a lovely place to move to, this does not in any way make the move any easier.

So we moved - and now, one year later, I see the end of the move happening.  The last room in our house is slowly emerging from the last boxes.  The driveway is almost ready for a second car.

I am almost ready to get into the jacuzzi again - and swim in the pool - as my ankle is just about healed.

Like the theater, some things just can't be rushed.  Curtain opens at 8pm - no one expects it to open 10 minutes early.  No one wants it to - so we wait in our seats for the latecomers.  And then, it happens.  The show begins, graduation day is here, the wedding processional is heard, the baby cry, the movers arrive.  We are in the middle of it....and everything rushes in like the ocean, and we try to swim, or float in a well-prepared boat that suddenly springs a leak in the middle of the flood.

And it all comes out fine a year later....and we look back and say, 'What a year this has been!' and look to see if we can find a spot for the bag of nails that has just emerged, that we needed 10 months ago, four months ago, last month, but was not found until today - and so we now try to remember where did we put the nails that we purchased 10 months ago?  Can we find that spot and put the two together - possibly to breed more nails for an upcoming chore?

Everything Place.  I hope I have finally arrived.  I may have, let's see.  I will have to look some more....as the itching....has still not stopped!

One hour later.......


It worked!  The de-cluttering worked!  After an hour of sorting, and putting away and digging through – my ankle (the one with the itchy) got stuck between two boxes, and when I twisted to get out of the tight spot, the boxes squeezed the almost healed area and the pain was intense!  I was amazed at how painful such a small spot could be!  But the amazing part was – the itching was gone!  And, in a few minutes, the pain, too.  So I stopped working for a bit……can’t have too much of a good thing ! 


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Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315
JanetSTigerMonologueMania.blogspot.com
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Playwright-in-Residence
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8


Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Happy Hoarder Day # 57 Itching to De-clutter April 22, 2015

Happy Hoarder  Day # 57 Itching to De-clutter April 22, 2015
 A journey into cleaning up a big pile of..... hoard
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                                                         Itching to De-clutter

                                                                       by Janet S. Tiger  
                                                            (c) 2015     all rights reserved
                                                               tigerteam1@gmail.com

For the last few weeks, I have been dealing with something.....unpleasant.  And not just my clutter.  I had an insect bite on my ankle.  Simple enough.  It itched.  And I scratched.  Simple.  And I scratched some more- because I cannot stand to itch.  Because I would rather it hurt than have it itch!  And so it stopped itching.  Simple.  Well, not really.

Because the itching made for an infection, which was actually quite painful and required antibiotics and care for it to heal, as the wound was in a part of the ankle which moves - every time I walk.  So the scab took weeks to heal - and a lot of ointments and bandages and it was not pretty.  Nor will the scar be pretty.  Thank God for socks!

Although I do have photos of this, I do not think they are appropriate for the general blog population, so why did I include this, how can I put it politely, very odd side of myself?  Because I also am trying to de-clutter bad habits, and scratching is one of my biggest.

So I have had a few weeks to cogitate on how stupid this scratching is - because of the scratching, I was unable to go into the jacuzzi, which I love, and which, in just 15 minutes a day, gives me a lovely touch of relaxation and vacation.

My solution?  I have decided to use the itching to good use - every time I want to scratch, I get up and go through some of my copious boxes of clutter - until the righteous desire to itch  is gone (cue song - I've Lost That Itching Feeling - sorry Righteous Brothers)

And it works.  A box of junk focuses my mind off the itch.  And I have the added value of de-cluttering.  Win-win.  I like that.  Now if I can just do that for the lottery numbers.....
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Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315
JanetSTigerMonologueMania.blogspot.com
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Playwright-in-Residence
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8


Monday, April 20, 2015

Happy Hoarder Day # 56 A Gentleman Caller April 20, 2015


            

Happy Hoarder  Day # 56 A Gentleman Caller April 20, 2015
 A journey into cleaning up a big pile of..... hoard
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                                                           A Gentleman Caller

                                                                       by Janet S. Tiger  
                                                            (c) 2015     all rights reserved
                                                               tigerteam1@gmail.com

I am sorry to have taken this long to write - I have still been de-cluttering, but somehow the writing about it has been difficult.  Okay, it's bad enough having to throw out this stuff, but even worse telling the world about it - I can hear people everywhere on the Internet laughing at the weird things that I have saved, and how hard it is to let them go.

But the one advantage - the one reliable constant throughout all this has been....my gentleman caller.  When I was younger, I had other gentleman callers (okay, by the time I was dating, they were called guys)  But these guys brought things to my door - flowers, candy, perfume....the occasional  painting.  Now, I have too much, and I am married.  But the idea of a gentleman caller is old-fashioned and reassuring.  And I may be married, but I still enjoy that every Monday, a nice young man comes to my door....he smiles if I see him, he is pleasant....and he ......takes away my junk.

He is the Amvets pick-up driver.  He does not need a pick-up line, this gentleman caller.  I call him, or rather, I call Amvets to come for my leftovers every Monday.

Just like all affairs, some weeks are better than others.  There is....more.  More stuff to give away.  I am not embarrassed by having only one meager box, I have three or four!  And some weeks, I have to take things from next to dumpsters to have something nice to donate - something other than old swim glasses and washed out towels.  Something like a pretty purple vacuum cleaner that looks like new.  

But my gentleman caller does not judge me.  He picks up all the boxes regardless of his own personal opinion.  And the stuff is gone.  Oh, wait, is that him now?  He is like a knight in shining metal wellpainted truck......and he even wears a brown suit of sorts - oh, well, I was always a sucker for a man in uniform......



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Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315
JanetSTigerMonologueMania.blogspot.com
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Playwright-in-Residence
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8


Sunday, April 12, 2015

Happy Hoarder Day # 55 Knowing it All April 12, 2015

Happy Hoarder  Day # 55 Knowing it All April 12, 2015
 A journey into cleaning up a big pile of..... hoard
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  Knowing it All
                                                                       by Janet S. Tiger  
                                                            (c) 2015     all rights reserved
                                                               tigerteam1@gmail.com
I have come to yet another monumental realization - keeping it all is not the same as knowing it all.  I suppose I always figured- in the way far back of my strange brain - that if I kept all those articles and books and magazines and newspapers, that I would somehow, magically, know everything in them.

Seeing as I can barely recall yesterday.....wait, I can barely recall ten minutes ago!.....I have come to the understanding that......keeping all the articles has not been working.

And these were great articles!  All about interesting things like......let me look.  No, I can't.......I threw them all out.....

Along with years of memories of homeschooling, and loving to read the newspaper every day, when it was big and made a nice sound when you turned the pages.  Well, it still makes a sound, better than a tablet, and I still save a few articles.....but now ....I save them online.  Really I do!  I swear!  Well, I save a few of the REAL newspapers, but don't tell Yvonne!  (What she doesn't know, won't make her laugh as loud)


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Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315
JanetSTigerMonologueMania.blogspot.com
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Playwright-in-Residence
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8


Saturday, April 11, 2015

Happy Hoarder Day # 54 Picking at the Problem April 11, 2015

Happy Hoarder  Day # 54  Picking at the Problem April 11, 2015
 A journey into cleaning up a big pile of..... hoard
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                                                          Picking at the Problem
                                                                       by Janet S. Tiger  
                                                            (c) 2015     all rights reserved
                                                               tigerteam1@gmail.com
No photos today - too tired.  And too tired of beating myself up for picking at my mosquito bites!  How is this involved with hoarding?  It is one of the worst types of hoarding - a hoarded habit.  A hoarded bad habit.  Without any redeeming qualities whatsoever!

I started in my youth (no excuse, just background) and I still scratch, then as the scratching creates wounds, I pick at the scabs.  But this time, I may have gone a bit too far, and one of the wounds became infected - needing antibiotics, and worst of all, stopped me from my swimming!  (Not good for infected skin to be in jacuzzis and chlorinated pools)

But I have made a vow - I am letting go of the need to itch - and the next bite I get, I am going to sort through a box of my junk (or more if necessary!) until the itching goes away.  Even if it happens in the middle of the night, I will be vigilant - and not pick.

For those who know me, they know that giving away this favorite hobby is more difficult than discarding almost anything else.  So wish me luck - I hope this time, I have picked a better solution!
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Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315
JanetSTigerMonologueMania.blogspot.com
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Playwright-in-Residence
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8


Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Happy Hoarder Day # 52 Taxes, Taxes, Taxes April 7, 2015

Happy Hoarder  Day # 52 Taxes, Taxes, Taxes April 7, 2015
 A journey into cleaning up a big pile of..... hoard
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                                                                    Taxes, Taxes, Taxes
                                                                       by Janet S. Tiger  
                                                            (c) 2015     all rights reserved
                                                               tigerteam1@gmail.com

No death in the future, but never the end of taxes, I fear.  How long to save them?  I hear seven years, but this does not stop me from having taxes for the last 29 years!  Every year we've been married......some of the papers are very decayed, smelly, wettened, in other words.....they are not so great.

The goal for tomorrow.....to discard a box from 1991.....can I do it?  Stay tuned!
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Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315
JanetSTigerMonologueMania.blogspot.com
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Playwright-in-Residence
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8


Monday, April 6, 2015

Happy Hoarder Day # 48, 49, 50, 51 April 3, 4,5, 6, 2015

Better
Happy Hoarder  Day # 48 April 3, 4,5, 6, 2015
 A journey into cleaning up a big pile of..... hoard
Before

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                                                                  Missing...Days
                                                                       by Janet S. Tiger  
                                                            (c) 2015     all rights reserved
                                                               tigerteam1@gmail.com


I who am so worried about losing things, missing out on the beauty of saved rotting newspapers and old movie theater tickets....I seem to have lost......several days.

Family came over for dinner on Friday night - and it looked better (see photo) but I was so exhausted for the next two days I can barely remember them!

Yet it was wonderful to have everything in better order - I even find myself wanting to hold onto the neat - so I actually donated a down comforter to Amvets today - without taking a photo! - without worrying too much, without wondering about all the memories I was giving away.  (It was a wedding gift, used for years, but now.....wetted and slightly smelly, needing attention to be cleaned and for someone else to enjoy)

Because, maybe....I am learning something.  Boy, is knowledge slow!  But here's the next big issue - I just learned how to delete old voicemails from my phone - 313 of them, all at once.  What a problem!  What a decision!  What's the issue?  When I gave away the comforter, it was BIG!  It took up room in my shed, but the 313 voicemails?  No one even knows they are gone!

Except me.....like discarding the old underwear that is ripped and torn.....naw, even that felt better.  And more people knew about it....thanks to the miracle of ......modern blogging......Now how will ever have the heart to delete these blog posts....in a hundred years......


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Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315
JanetSTigerMonologueMania.blogspot.com
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Playwright-in-Residence
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8


Thursday, April 2, 2015

Happy Hoarder Day # 47 Truth or Fridge- A-Dare April 2, 2015

Happy Hoarder  Day # 47 April 2, 2015
 A journey into cleaning up a big pile of..... hoard
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                                                     Truth or Fridge- a -Dare
                                                                       by Janet S. Tiger  
                                                            (c) 2015     all rights reserved
                                                               tigerteam1@gmail.com

Yet another tragedy - three slices of pizza in the garbage - tiny signs of molding (they were in the fridge for several weeks) forced me to ask my son (I couldn't do this all by myself!)

He did the horrid deed himself, shaking his head at me.

I had already cleaned out so much, I was tired.  And I had to play poker with my horse.  You don't believe I had to play poker with my horse?  Okay, I don't have a horse, but that's irrelevant - when it comes to excuses, one's just as good as another.


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Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315
JanetSTigerMonologueMania.blogspot.com
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Playwright-in-Residence
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8


Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Happy Hoarder Day # 46 KP April 1, 2015

Happy Hoarder  Day # 46 KP April 1, 2015
 A journey into cleaning up a big pile of..... hoard
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                KP
                                                                       by Janet S. Tiger  
                                                            (c) 2015     all rights reserved
                                                               tigerteam1@gmail.com
My father told me the most dreaded duty in the Army is KP - Kitchen Patrol.  I do not disagree - and I've never been in the military!  (Although my house has sometimes been compared to a war zone)
This is the table partly cleared off - I have determined that if I work steadily, I will be ready for the company coming this Friday night.....in about two weeks. 

I have also decided that I prefer looking at cute pictures of cats and dogs and guinea pigs - anything but the clutter I live in!
My goal - tomorrow's picture to be better......
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Janet S. Tiger    858-736-6315
JanetSTigerMonologueMania.blogspot.com
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Playwright-in-Residence
Swedenborg Hall 2006-8